i'm not so sure :(

in 2010 is ventured into NaNo-land, because i had an idea in my head, an idea that would not leave me. it grew in my head and all i did was letting it out with the help of NaNo's community and rules.

2010 November was painful and funny, rewarding and challenging a the same time.

i got attracted to it :)

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i was, and still am toying with the idea of doing NaNo again.

trouble is that i lack any strong idea, any notino that would refuse to eave me.

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this time last year i was scribbling notes to self about the future story, was writing outlines and sketching characters. at present i don't seem to have any of these moments :(

NaNo again... ?

it is inevitable...

we all see it coming...

november, the month of NaNo.

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do you plan to participate?

what are your plans?

(share as much as you feel appropriate)

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as for me, i have not written anything long since the NaNo in 2010.

that piece is still not finished.

something at the back of my head keeps telling me that it is unwise to start a new project without finishing the old one(s)... any pros and cons?

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i do have a plan for 2011, though...

in a post apocalyptic setting, it's a story about someone evaluating his (her?) former life and personal connections, relationships to lovers and friends.

i am still lacking the main purpose, hee.

an ice-breaker

wow, just today i sent a 10 thousand-character piece of Copper Moon to a publisher/editor/whatever. she is a reliable person, not just 'some random people from the street', so i knew what i was doing, don't worry about me :)

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i consider it a small step on my way.

and yes i know, this is just the beginning.

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finally, i am turning my mind again to that writing.

a little hiatus

i know it's been a while - this note is only a short reminder that i am still alive out here :)

now i have another writing project going on, and i am planning to return to revise Copper Moon.

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when i finished writing while doing NaNo in November 2010, i totally believed that i would revise the short story in December, or January at the latest.

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but life interfered... and my lazyness...

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i did some re-readings, some minor revisions, but most of the writing remained untouched. i am still aware of the elements of the story/polt/characters/events that needs major or minor polishing, and i hope to finish it some time later on.

i have some notes, suggestions for corrections and i still have the story in my head. which is a sure sign that Copper Moon is not yet finished - :)

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there is hope, isn't there?

:)

Jerom and his story

yesterday i wrote a short story called Jerom's story.

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here's the synopsis:

Jerom finds himself locked in a mental asylum. most of his inmates are criminals. Jerom is convinced he himself is not insane.

he makes friends, starts to feel at home, but still does not know why he is locked up here in the first place.

on a rainy day he starts hearing voices talking to him.

eventually, he becomes insane.

the staff finds out and reassures him in his (new?) state of mind.

Jerom finds being insane a great way to feel happy about being locked in.

he no longer cares about the reason.

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now, i planned to have a second part and a third part, too.

in the 2nd part, the reader finds out about the reason Jerom is in the asylum, that is, when the crime is described.

in the 3rd part, the reader finds out about Jerom's background, uhm, like a neglecting and/or abusive relative or something like that.

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now, i don't think i want to write part 2 and 3.

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my reasons:

to keep the intensity of part one, part 2 should be gory and sick. i don't think i want to write that way.

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part 3 on the other hand, should be a cover-up for Jerom's sin.

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and i don't think i want to give Jerom a pat on the shoulder. i don't think i want to take away the guilt. if Jerom did wrong, he should be punished. if Jerom, say, mutilated and or killed his wife, or set a little baby on fire - this is crime and evil. i don't want to give hims redemption by saying: 'oh, you poor Jerom, you did have a nasty childhood'.

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what's your opinion?

the hunt for copper moon

basic situation:

at home we have two computers.

one for me (work and hobbies like blogging and writing) and one for my son (for playing). the second one has some internal problems so the sound comes out distorted.

this computer has a great monitor, but it sometimes just decides to go wrong.

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about two weeks ago:

my computer said hello and was unable to find disk c and d...

fortunately, these are on a mobile rack, so i was able to switch to the second computer and was happy to see that my manuscript of the novel, along with some other writings (that are unavailable anywhere else) are still readable and manageable.

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until this very day, when this second computer just does not find racks e and f (those named c and d on the first computer)

it might or might not mean that i lost my writing.

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i might or might not go mad

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i hate computers.

kind of a whining

there was this guy on the online literary site who saw a couple of paragraphs from my manuscript. he was quite unimpressed i guess.

he kept telling me it was 'bad', the 'words were unsuitable', and finally that 'even an 8-year old does better'.

i see his point: he doesn't like my writing.

no problem with that.

but for god's sake.

putting his opinion this way is anything but helpful.

i asked him a couple of times to make his point clearer.

i asked him to name actual failures.

like... 'the verb in the second sentence (in paragraph 3) does not suit the action.' or.... 'when Margaret seeks advice from his father, there are too many blah sentences between them'...

like... i think you get it.

but no, he kept repeating that is was bad completely and kept referring to people who decided to throw away complete manuscripts....

so, i kindly asked him to leave it alone.

just leave it alone.

changing the names

i think I mentioned earlier that i wished to change the names of the characters. i thought i would write the novel in English, but i opted for higher diversity of vocabulary and deeper expression of thoughts so i wrote it in Hungarian.

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in a literary website some people commented that names are unimportant as long as there is a great story going on, while others used the old 'nomen est omen' argument to encourage me to choose carefully.

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the main character, a former Sarah, is going by Margaret, but now I am seeking a fine Hungarian alternative.

i think i get a great one by Greta, which is of German origin and has the same feeling: 'a' Greta sounds strong, yet close to nature. it feels like a feminie name that has no connection to any major religion. (this issue was the main reason to reject 'Sarah' - although a name i do like very much.

also Greta has a clear reference to Margaret.

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her mother is going by Nancy at the moment, but that must surely go.

there isn't anything similar in the Hungarian, so i have to invent and use something else instead.

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her father, now Kyle - the same situation.

i think i'll try Attila, which is a Hungarian name meaning father. Attila, the hun has a dubious reputation. some historians say he was good, some go for bad. some even venture into saying that the huns have nothing to do with the hungarians.

the same goes to Margaret/Greta's father: Nancy thinks he was attractive and seducing on one hand and flirtatious and careless on the other.

as Margaret/Greta has received quite a bunch of remarkable genes from his father, the simile may go further on...

i think Attila will do.

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what's your opinion?

how do you choose names?

or do characters with specific names just appear seemingly out of nowhere, begging you to be writing about them?

revision and title

yesterday i broke my habit of not revising my NaNo manuscript.

i started to revise it right in December, but found everything to my liking, so i decided it was not the time to revise, so i quit and have not revised/reread ever since.

but behold!

just yesterday i browsed my computer and somehow chapter 7 caught my eyes.

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i read it at once in one reading (it is only 2300+ words) and...

i felt the same emotions between the characters i had felt when i was writing it in November.

chapter 7 is about the main character saying goodbye to all that ties her to her present life. to her friends, family (what is left of it, that is...), work, the flat she lives in, her landlady, her present lover, and a man she she also loves.

i recall having written this chapter almost entirely in tears, because it is so moving. or, so i felt. i don't know what reaction it will have on future readers, if there would be any, but it definitely made a strong impression on me.

yesterday's big surprise was that the words, that is, of chapter 7, still have the same impression on me when i read it.

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now don't get me wrong. i am not saying that i am overwhelmed by my writing's quality. it's just that it makes me feel the same way over and over again.

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question 1

do you think i am ready to revise?

should i wait some more - or is it already too late?

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question 2

the Hungarian title translates to 'Pebbles of the Moon', or 'Moon Pebbles'

which one sounds better?

you see, i don't really get the difference between the two suggestions. do you?

if none of these sounds great, the book will go by the title 'Copper Moon'

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mwah-hah-hah

'the book'

it is not even translated to English.

:)

writing

all right, this is just a short check-in to make you see that i am alive.
i just don't seem to find time to toy with my manuscript, but, well, later on, sometimes...
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in the meantime i sometimes do write, but whatever i write i write in hungarian.
i know i am not what people call a prolific writer.

NaNo news 14

i think the necessary time to separate myself from the manuscript has elapsed.
just the other day i have started to re-read chapter two again and voilá - i got no further than the second paragraph and found at least five 'already's.
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i think i'm in a good state of mind to see the mistakes now :)
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have a happy new year filled with bunches of new manuscripts for ya all!

NaNo news 13

before i started revision, i wrote a few lines about the purpose of each chapter. like in chapter 2 for example, the aim is to 'get the reader know about the family the main character arrives into' i wanted to describe the events and circumstances that 'precede the birth of the main character', because she is a fetus to be born at the very beginning.

the reader finds out how 'the parents had met', how the 'family of the mother rejected the father' being part of the family in the future, etc.

at the end of chapter two, there is a strong indication that 'the main character comes to life'.

these are the very words i sketched for myself before starting revision.

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i have revised chapter 2, and sent it via email to that someone i mentioned earlier.
i corrected all typos, subject and verb mismatches and the like. believe me, there were only one or two of these throughout the 4100+ words.
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i don't know if i'm doing it right.
i seem to be getting lost somehow :(((

NaNo news 12

i have finished it and let it rest for a week.
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i have changed the title in the hungarian version. to me, in my own language, 'copper moon', or as it was in hungarian 'velvet moon' and 'bronze moon' sounded cheesy.

and in general, almost any [adjective]+[noun] sounds cheesy as a title.

unless it's a strange/strikingly new/original combination it does sound either cheesy or boring. I mean, even i would not buy a book with the title 'velvet moon' (in hungarian).

so now the title is changed into h_oldk_avicsok, which roughly translates to 'pebbles of the moon'.

i wanted to include the moon in the title but faced that since the twilight series (which is a huge attraction in hungary, too), reading the noun 'moon' on a title almost instantly makes the reader associate that book with the series.

which is a sad thing, for beacuse of this newest and successful branch of pop literature, some words might just go missing from the vocabulary of normal people.

it's not that i haven't watched all the 3 parts.

yup, i did an in almost one go.

shame on me?

hm...

but i don't want people associate the series with me and my novel.

if you ask me though, i am all team jacob.

but that little secret should remain between you and me :)))

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now i have a friend who helps me with the first revision.

we go chapter by chapter.
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NaNo news 11

this surely is one of the last posts about NaNo 2010.
i am kind of desperate and sad.
i still have 5500+ words to write and almost two days.
mathematically speaking, it is quite difficult, though not at all impossible.
but.
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i don't know how to finish it!
heeelp!
:))
i am unsure about the ending.
:s

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anyway, i'm back to writing.

NaNo news 10

i have finished (sort of) chapters 1.2.3.4a.4b.5a.5b. and 8.

now i am writing chapter 6.

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i introduced some new characters, but at the moment all they do is serve the purpose of telling the story of the main character. they don't really have a life of their own.

any comments on that?

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also i have had some problems with time in the story. when and what happened, for how long something lasted, when did mc moved from town a to town b , when did mc changed her jobs, and so on.
i figured out i have to write short and outlined biography.
i bet writers out there start with such a biography, it must be so obvious...
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i have 19thousand words to add and only 6 days to accomplish this goal.
i am being realistic.
i don't think i wll do it on time.
according to nano statistics, i should write 3000+ words a day to finish on time.
my average words per day is 1300+.
mathematics.
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:(

NaNo news 9

on saturday (20 november) i've finished chapter 5b.

i let some new characters appear in the story - they just wanted to be there. it's magic.

:)))

while finishing chapter 5b, i was literally crying - for it ends with a moving scene between MC and her mother.

i don't know if this scene is cheesy or not, but it is still a draft that can be revised and rewritten later on.

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today (21 november) i have finished chapter8, which is some sort of a counterpart for chapter1 (which is also a poem).

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yesterday i did exceptionally well, wrote about 2500 words, but today i haven't had the chance to write. i only had time to write this short poem, so today's word count is about 500+ words.

NaNo news 8

i've finished chapter 5a.
but now i'm happy i'm light yellow (as opposed to orange)
i wrote less yesterday then i had done the day before yesterday and wrote less today than i did yesterday.
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well, these past two days have been hard for me.
not only had i finish writing and turn my computer off around noon, only to return dead-tired by 11pm, but i am kind of stuck.
i don't think the story works, i have to few characters and events going on.
maybe i should have opted for a (somewhat long-ish) short story instead.
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bye for now.

NaNo news 7

this time i am a bit over halfway into chapter 5a, where the events are happening in the present time, along a definite time-line and i don't have to arrange and rearrange my thoughs about continuity. it also one of the most exciting pieces in the book, well, that is what i say.

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no-one else has ever read it, but i will test it on my husband first.

too bad, he's not into fiction at all.

he prefers historic writing, memoirs, scientific and other non-fiction books.

NaNo news 6

so, well, i have finished chapter 4a - for there has to be a 4b as well.
i have not invented as much into chapter 4a as i thought i had to.
the story just unfolded without adding too many new characters.
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i keep reminding me that this is a draft and i may add or remove anything later on.
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saturdays and sundays are not the best days to write.
the kids are at home and on saturday i had a choir session between 10am to 1pm.
but these can also be considered as lame excuses.
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i wanted to write chapter 4b today, and sketched some small scenes while i was still writing chapter 4a.
i'm working along those ideas.
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yesterday i was browsing the nano site and found out that some people manage to write as much as 7,000 words a day.
i just don't understand.
it makes me want to stop.
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bad thoughts.
:(

NaNo news 6

as you can see on my NaNo word count widget (see the sidebar), i happened to have managed at least one day to write slightly over the recommended average (indicated by green).

i wrote well into chapter 3, the chapter i didn't feel like writing two days ago - see the post below.

but somehow i managed to see what is going on at that part of the story.

standing at about 4,000 words alone, i declare chapter 3 ready.

well, for the time being, that is.

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so, whenever i have time during the day, i'm off to chapter 4, which is supposed to be about the school years of my Margaret.

this is when she finds out and realises that she is a bit different from the others, this is where some other characters emerge and act beside her immediate family.

(in chapters 2 and 3 it was only her mother, father, mothernal grandparents, her aunt and a nurse at the hospital).

now in chapter 4, i have to create her teachers, schoolmates, first love? - oops, i had no idea about that ;)

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so far, so good.

i'm enjoying the process.

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