yesterday i wrote a short story called Jerom's story.
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here's the synopsis:
Jerom finds himself locked in a mental asylum. most of his inmates are criminals. Jerom is convinced he himself is not insane.
he makes friends, starts to feel at home, but still does not know why he is locked up here in the first place.
on a rainy day he starts hearing voices talking to him.
eventually, he becomes insane.
the staff finds out and reassures him in his (new?) state of mind.
Jerom finds being insane a great way to feel happy about being locked in.
he no longer cares about the reason.
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now, i planned to have a second part and a third part, too.
in the 2nd part, the reader finds out about the reason Jerom is in the asylum, that is, when the crime is described.
in the 3rd part, the reader finds out about Jerom's background, uhm, like a neglecting and/or abusive relative or something like that.
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now, i don't think i want to write part 2 and 3.
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my reasons:
to keep the intensity of part one, part 2 should be gory and sick. i don't think i want to write that way.
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part 3 on the other hand, should be a cover-up for Jerom's sin.
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and i don't think i want to give Jerom a pat on the shoulder. i don't think i want to take away the guilt. if Jerom did wrong, he should be punished. if Jerom, say, mutilated and or killed his wife, or set a little baby on fire - this is crime and evil. i don't want to give hims redemption by saying: 'oh, you poor Jerom, you did have a nasty childhood'.
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what's your opinion?
4 comments:
I think such a story could be done at several lengths if you wanted. A short flash piece with just part 1, or a longer story incorporating 2 and 3.
I think part 1 is great. Maybe you could very subtly sneak bits of parts 2 and 3 into part 1. It's fascinating how this story could ultimately turn into anything you want it to be.
Charles,
thank for your words of encouragement.
i may not have put it clear in my post but it is not at all about length.
it has now grown into an ethical problem.
Vesper,
i'm glad you liked it.
there can be various interpretations and it is comforting and strange at the same time, isn't it? :)
Hi Szelsofa, it is difficult to offer an advice because you are still unsure of the reason why Jerom is in a asylum. But i really liked part one. I think it is always fascinating to see what constitutes sanity. Is it what other people make out of it? Or what you did? or how you think? Jerom could be a very nice guy but something one day just pushed him to that level that he just breaks (because of his past) and has completely blocked that memory since. Or it could be the way he thinks of people at times, as if they were rats (lol) which makes his case difficult to evaluate. Any way there are millions of way you can develop this and i am sure you will find a way.
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